Making It Through The Tough Days

Making it through tough days

Living with a chronic illness often feels like a never-ending rollercoaster of physical, emotional, and mental challenges. On some days, staying positive can feel impossible—like sunshine on a rainy day. But cultivating a positive mindset doesn’t mean ignoring the difficulties; rather, it’s about building resilience and finding joy in moments, however small, despite the hardship. There is always something beautiful around you. You just have to look for it.

A great piece of advice I received once was, the mind goes when your energy flows. In other words, if you think your life is dark and negative all the time your mind will find things around you that will back up that narrative. But if you change the story and even if you are living with a chronic illness and you choose to live a joyful fulfilled life your mind will also back up that up with facts around you.

This is why when you’re navigating life with a chronic illness it is important to have some thoughtful strategies to help you maintain a positive outlook when the going gets tough. Because life unfortunately will have its ups and downs, having a plan for the downs will be a tremendous help.

Why Positivity Matters (Even When It’s Hard) 

Positivity is often misunderstood as pretending everything is okay when it’s not. But in reality, staying positive is more about nurturing hope, building emotional resilience, and finding ways to adapt to life's inevitable challenges. For individuals with chronic illnesses, a positive mindset is especially important because it can impact your emotional health, relationships, and even physical well-being. 

Research conducted by the Mayo Clinic suggests that maintaining a positive outlook can reduce stress, improve coping mechanisms, and even enhance overall physical health. But being "positive" doesn’t mean forcing fake happiness; it's about pursuing balance, hope, and gratitude—even if life feels heavy. 

Now, let's jump into some actionable strategies for staying positive. 

1. Acknowledge Your Feelings 

Staying positive doesn’t mean ignoring or suppressing negative emotions like anger, sadness, or frustration. Bottling up feelings can lead to burnout and emotional fatigue. Instead, try acknowledging these emotions without judgment. 

What you can do:

• Journaling: Write down your feelings as they come. Acknowledge how you feel without trying to “fix” yourself for feeling that way. 

• Talk it out: Share your thoughts with someone you trust like a friend, family member, or therapist. 

• Practice mindfulness: Observe your thoughts without attaching to them. Apps like Calm or Headspace can guide you. 

• Crack a joke. Sometimes it is okay to laugh at a bad situation. Laughter can be the best medicine.

• Vent in a way that doesn't negatively impact others. In your journal for example, create a "rage page" and let out your frustration is a positive way. Scream into a pillow or talk an "angry" walk, where you power walk and vent into your memo's app on your phone or just talk to yourself. I like to put my headphones in, so my neighbors think I'm on a really intense phone call.

Once you validate your emotions, it becomes easier to create space for positivity. 

2. Set Realistic Expectations for Yourself 

Living with a chronic illness often means that your energy levels and abilities vary from day to day. Comparing yourself to others, or even to your past self, can lead to guilt or frustration. One of the most powerful strategies for fostering positivity is learning to work within your current abilities rather than fighting against them. 

What you can do:

• Create adaptable goals: Instead of focusing on what you “used to do,” set small, flexible goals. For instance, “I’ll walk for five minutes today if I feel up to it.” 

• Celebrate small wins: Did you get out of bed today? Make it through a tough appointment? Celebrate those victories—they matter. 

• Use a priority list: Write down 3-5 things you’d like to accomplish each day and be kind to yourself if you only achieve one. 

By giving yourself grace and practicing self-compassion, you remove the pressure to be “perfect” and create room for healthier positivity. 

3. Surround Yourself with a Supportive Community 

Struggling alone can amplify negative feelings and make challenges seem insurmountable. Building a support system of people who understand—or are willing to understand—what you’re going through can be a game-changer. 

What you can do:

• Join the Warriors Friends Club: A supportive community that truly gets what it's like to live with chronic illness because they live it too. A place where you can connect with other globally offer encouragement, solace, friendship, celebrate each other's wins big and small and empower the community as a whole. 

• Strengthen personal relationships: Share your feelings with loved ones and educate them about your illness so they can better support you. 

• Advocate for yourself: If someone doesn’t understand your needs or limitations, don’t be afraid to kindly set boundaries or educate them. 

Feeling genuinely supported can make even the hardest days feel a little lighter. 

4. Practice Gratitude Daily 

Even amidst hardship, there are often small moments of light—a warm cup of tea, a kind word, or a sunrise through your bedroom window. Gratitude doesn’t erase pain, but it can make room for joy alongside it. 

What you can do:

• Keep a gratitude journal: Each evening, write down 3-5 things you’re grateful for, no matter how small. 

• Use affirmation cards: Start your day with a card that focuses on appreciation or hope. 

• Reflect intentionally: The next time something makes you smile, pause and fully savor that moment. 

Gratitude rewires your focus, encouraging times of calm and positivity even during challenges. 

5. Engage in Activities That Energize You 

Chronic illnesses often drain physical energy, but mental and emotional energy can also take a hit. Finding hobbies or activities that spark joy (and don’t over-tax your body) can offer a welcome reprieve from illness-related stress. 

What you can do:

• Pick low-energy hobbies: Try activities like knitting, listening to podcasts, reading, or painting. 

• Explore nature: When possible, take a short stroll in a nearby park. Studies repeatedly show that time in nature can reduce stress and boost mental health. 

• Learn something new: Take an online course or try your hand at a new skill like cooking or digital photography. 

Infusing fun into your routine—even in small doses—acts as a breath of fresh air in your healing process. 

6. Focus on What You Can Control 

When navigating chronic illness, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed by circumstances outside your control. While you can’t always change your health, focusing on smaller, manageable aspects of your day can reduce feelings of helplessness. 

What you can do:

• Build a routine: Structure in your day helps create stability and reduces feelings of uncertainty. 

• Take charge of your environment: Keep your space clean and filled with positivity-enhancing elements like cozy blankets, plants, or your favorite scents. 

• Focus on self-care: Establish a nighttime skincare routine or prepare snacks that nourish both body and soul. 

Shifting the narrative to what you can influence adds to your sense of strength and positivity. 

7. Seek Professional Help When Needed 

Sometimes, positivity can’t be cultivated alone—and that’s okay. If feelings of sadness, stress, or hopelessness persist for long periods or interfere with your daily life, seeking professional therapy or counseling may provide relief and guidance. 

What you can do:

• Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT): A proven approach to help shift negative thought patterns. 

• Speak with a therapist who specializes in chronic illness: They can provide unique insights to help in ways others might not understand. 

Remember, seeking help isn’t a sign of weakness—it’s an act of strength. 

Find the Sun During the Storm 

Living with a chronic illness can feel overwhelming, and positivity might not come easily every day—that’s perfectly fine. Staying positive is not about dismissing the difficulties of your situation but equipping yourself with tools to handle them with grace, resilience, and hope. 

Take small steps each day, whether it’s journaling your feelings, showing kindness to yourself, or savoring life’s little joys. Surround yourself with people who get it, and never hesitate to reach out for help when needed. 

And on days when positivity still feels out of reach? That’s okay too. Focus on surviving that moment, knowing better days will come.